Fussy Eater Solutions
“We must be the worst you have seen when it comes to how our children behave around food!” is one comment I hear all the time from parents of autistic fussy eaters.
It saddens me to hear parents voice such feelings of guilt or even shame. Perhaps these parents have been on the receiving end of judgment, yet I cannot conceive a greater challenge than feeding an autistic child with a small range of accepted foods.
Stress, worry and anxiety around feeding are widespread for parents of children on the spectrum. That is because children on the spectrum are 5 times more likely to be fussy eaters[1]. Growth, development, nutritional deficiencies and long term health can be a concern, while mealtimes can turn into “meltdown central” if children are faced with somewhat challenging foods.
When feeding children becomes a stressful activity there’s no joy in eating.
Take a long term view
Parents can grow frustrated as they spend hours trying to unlock their child’s potential, taking them to multiple therapy sessions. Progress may be slow. Regardless of the approaches parents choose to support their fussy eating child, it is important to imagine what their grown up child will be like, as an adult. I would even argue that no progress can be achieved unless there is a long term view. What will their child know about food? How well will their child know the family eating culture? Will they be able to cook themselves a meal? What other useful skills will they have when it comes to feeding themselves? Will they have learned the social skills that are needed when going to restaurants with friends or on a date? Taking some time to think long term will help you relax and see with clarity what you need to do next.
Start early and keep offering
Indeed it pays to think about feeding difficulties as soon as possible and gather some thoughts to put together a plan that works for your family. As children first show signs of extreme fussy eating, make sure you get a full assessment from your doctor. Then get working! Keep offering foods from the centre of your table (French Family Style of serving limits waste and works wonders). Aim for a list of at least 20 dishes or recipes plus accompaniments (bread, cheese, fruit for example) you can serve. Then serve them. You may have heard of exposure. Children on the spectrum need probably more of it.
Beware of ruling foods out
Simply because your child refuses them does not mean you have to eliminate foods, your child may put them away and sort them out while getting some exposure in the process. Ruling out foods is a downward spiral which further limits the range of accepted food.
Beware of serving one food over and over
There has been success with a specific food, as you rejoice and serve it over and over to a happy eater, you will be setting yourself for failure. Your child is likely to change their mind and refuse the food altogether after weeks of loving it.
Get to tasty and texture
You will wonder about your child’s sensory sensitivities and how they may relate to foods. Is it the smell, is it the colour, is it the sound, is it the taste or simply the texture? I have written here previously about kids on the spectrum the french canteen. I have met so many children who eat “unusual” foods due to families’ eating culture and regardless of autism! Therefore all children have some degree of flexibility with foods that are part of their family food culture. Can you use what you know about your child’s eating to venture to something new? Can you cook this dish but make it a bit crunchy? Can you use this tomato base to cook a new meat? Can you change the pasta shape in this dish? There are ways to accommodate foods to make them more palatable from a sensory point of view.
Thankfully children on the spectrum can also enjoy their food, learn cooking skills and become confident and competent eaters. It starts at home with the right advice and plan. If you need support then get in touch with the Fussy Eater Specialist.
[1] Sharp, W.G., Berry, R.C., McCracken, C. et al. Feeding Problems and Nutrient Intake in Children with Autism Spectrum Disorders: A Meta-analysis and Comprehensive Review of the Literature. J Autism Dev Disord 43, 2159–2173 (2013). https://doi.org/10.1007/s10803-013-1771-5
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