Kiddipedia
By Joshua Cavanagh
As a first-time parent to a daughter of 7 months, I have found parenting to be a never-ending journey filled with highs, lows, ups, and downs. But, for the most part, it has been filled with ambiguity. And while being a parent is a life-long learning process, I have learned immense life lessons in just the seven months I’ve had so far. This isn’t to say that my learnings as a parent are over, they are only the beginning, however they are certainly things I wish I knew before I took my daughter home from hospital that day. With this in mind, I want to share five lessons that I have learnt as a first-time dad, from one new parent to another.
Lesson 1: Being emotionally strong
When I first became a dad, a key thing I learnt was that I’m not as emotionally strong as I thought I was. Despite displaying a competent ability to deal with my emotions and feelings throughout my 14 years in the military, when it came to the birth of my daughter, I experienced feelings that were completely new to me. I know they say you don’t know love until you have kids and that couldn’t be more true.
Lesson 2: Embracing baby tech
One thing I did when I was expecting my daughter was research, research, research. During this process, my wife and I found articles, books and various videos on what to expect when expecting. However, we also found there were not enough tips and parenting hacks that could keep us informed of our daughter’s well-being inside and out. That was when I started to look into smart baby tech and I realised I could get even more insights into my baby than any book could tell me. One product that has assisted us greatly in the parenting journey is the Owlet Smart Sock. We needed something that would stop us from constantly checking on our daughter while she slept and over-examining her movements throughout the night. With the Owlet Smart Sock,it tracks our daughter’s heart rate and oxygen level as she sleeps and even notifies us if these readings fall outside the preset zones, making the way we parent a whole lot easier. Knowing that our daughter’s well-being is being tracked and providing us real-time insights into her readings, gives us such invaluable peace of mind that we are able to sleep more easily ourselves while our little one snoozes away as well. Case and point: Always trust your gut when it comes to your baby’s well-being.
Lesson 3: Remembering every child is different
Comparing your child to another child is the worst torture a parent can put themselves through, especially with the fact that each child reaches milestones at different times. Although there is always some envy when you see another child do something before your own begins to learn it, it helps to remember that they will be learning at their own pace their whole life, through toddlerhood all the way through to their teenage years and then into adulthood.
Lesson 4: Patience is key to parenting
Having patience with your child is key. It’s key not just for your child’s benefit but also for yourself and your partner. This comes down to every child being different and knowing that you can’t rush the time it takes for your child to develop new skills. When we feel impatient, it can affect our own emotions, which, in turn, can be reflected onto your child. Keeping a cool head and staying strong when your child is upset or unwell is extremely important.
Lesson 5: Knowing it’s OKAY to ask for help
As a new parent, definitely one of the most important lessons is remembering that it is ok to ask for help. Whether it is from a grandparent, godparent, friend or group setting, the most important thing to remember is the well-being of your child is what matters most. If asking for help means that you are finally able to get some rest and function at 100% then that means that your child is going to be getting that 100% from you. If you are operating at anything less than that then you can’t provide your child with the 100% they deserve. Asking for help only benefits everyone.
Becoming a father has changed me in over 100 ways and while raising a child will always have its ongoing surprises, I wish I was told about these five lessons above before I brought my daughter home from the hospital to give me the confidence and calmness that I needed.
Joshua served in the Army for fourteen years and a half year in Infantry. Now, Joshua is a fulltime dad after becoming a first-time parent in February 2022 to his daughter, Alora Mae.
