Dr Scott Zarcinas
by Dr. Scott Zarcinas
Your child’s attitude is the wand from which magic will happen in their life. Help them get their attitude right, and you will help their world to be right.
This is easy to say, but how does this work in practice?
Let’s use the attitude of safety to show how it works. A ship’s captain and a pilot of a passenger aircraft share the same attitude and intention of safety first. To the captain and the pilot, safety for their passengers and crew is paramount. Everything they do is with the aim of arriving at their destination safely.
Because of this attitude, they don’t take unnecessary risks. They follow protocols and guidelines. They have manifests and checklists. All their thoughts and actions are focussed on getting their passengers, crew and cargo safely to port.
Imagine, though, if upon boarding your cruise ship you overheard the captain boasting how fast he could get to the next port through a section of reef that other captains were too scared to sail through? What if you glimpsed the pilot in the cockpit taking a swig from his hipflask before telling the crew to get ready to take off?
You wouldn’t feel very safe, would you? That’s because you know the captain and the pilot are not thinking ‘safety first’. They don’t have the right attitude to be in control of the vessel on which you’ve boarded.
Your child’s attitude therefore sets the tone of their experience because it determines the focus of their thoughts, which in turn sets the focus of their actions.
You have probably experienced this in moments when you are rushed. If you are late for an important meeting, your attitude is “I have to get there as quickly as possible, or I’ll get in trouble.”
So you speed through the traffic, maybe go through a couple of amber lights, cut people off, swear at a few bicyclists that slow you down, and pray that you don’t zip past a police car and get a speeding fine.
Then you rush into the meeting only to realise you’ve forgotten your notes.
In this situation, your attitude is one of speed, not of safety. You need to get to your destination as quickly as you can. So your actions and behaviour reflect that attitude. Hopefully you don’t have an accident on the way and you avoid hitting a pedestrian.
Parents of newborn babies know how important safety is. On the first trip home from the hospital, the baby is carefully restrained in a capsule, which itself is secured in the backseat of the car by the seatbelt and safety hook. The parents then tentatively reverse out of the car park and slowly make their way home, keeping well below the speed limit and ensuring a huge distance between them and the car in front should they suddenly have to slam on the brakes. Then they breathe a huge sigh of relief when they pull into the driveway and turn off the ignition.
In this situation, the new parents are terrified of having an accident and are on high alert. Their sole thoughts are for the safety of the baby, and so it should be.
In the scenarios of rushing for your meeting and getting your newborn baby home safely, your attitude determines your behaviour. When you think speed, you act in a rush. When you think safety, you act safely.
When you have the right attitude, you have the right behaviour.
A consistent, good attitude reaps consistent, good rewards. It’s magical what a good attitude can produce. Which is why Zig Ziglar emphasised the importance of attitude when he said:
“Your attitude, not your aptitude, determines your altitude.”
Talent and ability can only take your child so far. Determination will take them further. But it’s their attitude that will determine how far they go and how successful they become.
And one of the best attitudes you can teach your children is The Golden Rule:
Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.
In other words, do for others as you would like them to do for you.
So, a good way to help your children develop the right attitude is to remind them to constantly ask them self: “What would others like in this situation?”
About DoctorZed
Dr. Scott Zarcinas (aka DoctorZed) is a doctor, author, and transformologist. He helps aspirational people to be happier, more confident, decisive, and effective so they can reach their potential and become the person they are capable of being. He specialises in helping work-at-home fathers build their self-esteem and self-belief so they have the confidence and the courage to live a life that is true to themself. DoctorZed gives regular workshops, seminars, presentations, and courses to support those who want to make a positive difference through positive action. Connect with him at:
F: www.facebook.com/YNSOB.by.Dr.Scott.Zarcinas/
T: www.twitter.com/DrScottZarcinas
L: www.linkedin.com/in/dr-scott-zarcinas-6572399/
