Kiddipedia
If you have children and you decide to separate from your partner, you might be considering as fresh start. But be careful – your Sea Change (or Tree Change) may not be as straightforward as you think.
Under the Family Law Act, one of the key considerations for children of separated parents is the benefit to the children of having a meaningful relationship with both of the child’s parents. In some cases, this can be difficult to achieve if the parents are not living near each other.
If you have separated, no matter how tempting, you should not contemplate moving towns, states or countries, without discussing it with your ex. If you leave without an agreement, you may end up being taken to Court and with a Court Order requiring you to move back. This can be expensive, disruptive and very stressful for everyone involved.
The best way for you to move successfully with your children is for your ex to agree AND for this agreement to be formalised. If you don’t have a record of the agreement, the Court may require you to move back if your ex changes their mind, or if they later deny there was ever an agreement.
There are many out of court options available for parents to reach agreement. This can include the “kitchen table method” – which is essentially you and your ex having discussions directly with each other without outside assistance. If you don’t want to face your ex, you might try by exchanging emails or using a Parenting App for communication.
If you decide that you do need some assistance, you might consider involving professionals. One option is to use a mediator to help you and your ex reach a compromise. Other options include negotiations via lawyers, Child Inclusive Practice, lawyer assisted mediation, Collaborative Law or Arbitration.
Once you have an agreement, the best protection for you is to have Consent Orders drafted by your lawyer, signed by each of you and filed at Court. Another option is a Parenting Plan. At the very least get the agreement in writing. You should seek advice from a family lawyer about what is best in your particular circumstances before you sign anything.
If you cannot reach agreement and you still want to move, you have the option of applying to the Court. These are often referred to as “relocation cases”. This can be a lengthy process, so the sooner you commence proceedings the better, but you should not apply to the Court unless you have exhausted all of your other options first and sought legal advice.
If you are successful in achieving an agreement (or a Court Order) allowing relocation, once you move, there are a number of things you can do to ensure your children continue to maintain a good relationship with their other parent. Technology can be a great way to help your children keep in touch with the other parent and other family members when distance is an obstacle. A co-parenting website or app can also help the two of you to continue to co-parent despite the physical space between you.
Parenting from different locations can be a challenge, but there are many successful separated parents who make it work for them. It is all about what works for you and your family.
This article contains general information only. You should obtain independent legal advice particular to your circumstances.
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