Kiddipedia
Dr Michael Herd, psychologist – Triple P – Positive Parenting Program
Time flies when you’re raising kids! This Father’s Day, amongst the gifts and cards, it can help to think about those little moments that help build positive family relationships, encourage our kids to be happier and more confident, and create childhood memories that will always raise a smile.
We know from research that Australia’s dads, step-dads, grandfathers, and other father figures typically want to spend more time with their family, but many struggle to find practical ways to do so.
The great news is that you don’t need to spend hours at a time with your child to have a positive impact. Spending small chunks of time, more often, is a terrific way to support your child’s wellbeing. For example, when your child approaches you, to show you something, or ask a question, it’s easy to brush them off if you’re busy. But if you’re able to respond at these times, even if only for just a minute, you’re sending a powerful message.
Research reveals that when parents spend quality time with their child, the more positive the family environment and the greater long-term success for the child.
Father’s Day is a good time to reflect on those simple, low-key fun times where you just enjoy each other’s company, or watch what your child is doing. This tells your child they’re valuable and precious to you. You can send this message without having be with your child all day, every day.
We live in an ‘urgent’ world where we are so busy with the day-to-day family stuff, that little opportunities can go by us. Taking the time to stop and look into your child’s eyes and hear what they have to say will have a positive impact throughout the teenage years and beyond.
Are there some little dad traditions you can enjoy with your kids? It doesn’t have to be a grand gesture or something you do on a particular date. It could be a routine like going for ice-cream on Friday nights or cooking your favourite food on the weekends. Or it can be something you work on together, like a creative project.
A quick informal poll around the Triple P International head office revealed some typical Aussie dad traditions, including enjoying foods with a family connection, from sushi to biltong, and favourite TV shows. Some dads talked about their quirky ‘goodnight’ phrase or bedtime story that kids loved, others their role as the go-to parent for advice on a particular topic or homework subject. For many fathers and father-figures, following a sporting team or movie franchise has also become a popular way to bond.
We know that parents’ ongoing involvement in children’s lives provides a strong framework for success throughout childhood, into the teenage years, and on into adulthood.
But when life’s stressful, especially if you’re not sure how to communicate effectively with your kids, discuss emotional topics, or handle behaviour issues without raising your voice, it can help to get some positive support.
Delivery of the Triple P – Positive Parenting Program to parents and carers of children in Australia is supported by funding from the Australian Government Department of Health and Aged Care under the Parenting Education and Support Program. Parents and carers can access free, online parenting support 24/7 at www.triplep-parenting.net.au
Michael Herd is a born and bred Queenslander who has trained parenting Triple P practitioners in Australia, UK, USA, Canada, Hong King and Singapore. He’s a registered Psychologist who has been working with children and families as a primary school teacher, guidance counsellor and psychologist for more than 30 years, including in regional Queensland. After doing his PhD researching parenting support for families of premature babies, Michael is now also a popular Triple P seminar presenter. He also loves his grandkids, restoring old vehicles, ARL, and busting out some classic rock and blues on his guitar!
