Kiddipedia
To most people, their children are their most precious asset. Deciding who will care for your minor children if you are no longer here is something that a lot of people struggle with when putting their Will in place. So, let’s help you along and share some tips of what you should consider when appointing a guardian for your children.
Surprises aren’t always nice
Before appointing someone as the guardian of your children you should have a chat with them and ask them whether they would be happy to take on this role if something happened to you. By that I do not mean you ask them to the guardian, they say yes and you high five each other and the matter is resolved.
I am talking about having a really thorough chat with the guardian. Ask them if they understand the implications of looking after your children, discuss their living arrangements and how this would impact their lives if your children were in their care. Are they comfortable with the drastic change having an additional child or children will bring?
By having these conversations it allows both parties to fully understand the role of guardian and to fully comprehend each other’s expectations
The Right Fit
It is important that you should look at appointing someone who your children know well and have a fantastic relationship with. Shipping your children off to another state to live with and be cared for by a long-lost relative is not ideal.
It is also good idea to choose a guardian whose values align with your own. In such cases they are likely to be raising their own children in a similar fashion to how you are raising your children. If your children were to be raised by them your children continue to be exposed to the same value system that they are familiar with.
In addition of extreme importance is the structure of the family unit of the person whom you would like to appoint as your children’s guardian. If you have four children and your proposed guardian has five children and live in a four bedroom house is this really going to be the right fit for your children and the proposed guardian’s family unit.
It doesn’t have to be a family member
Many people feel that they need to appoint a family member to be your children’s guardian. You don’t. It’s an important role and you really should consider the very best person who could care for your children, whether that be a family member or otherwise.
I have had many clients who have chosen not to appoint siblings as their children’s guardian solely because they have a different value system and are travelling a different path in life.
Often people consider appointing their parents as their children’s guardian. One thing to consider in this instance is the age of your parents. If your parents are in their sixties and your children are aged six months and two years of age, are your parents really the best option to raise your children? Are they going to want to undertake this role? As they and your children get older will their health allow them to play the role of mum and dad’s taxi service, transporting them to sporting events and other activities that teenagers partake in? I am also very cautious in generalising as I appreciate some eighty year old are fitter, more energetic and living life more so than some thirty year old, in which case your parent’s may be the perfect choice as your children’s guardian.
Involve your children in the process
I am an advocate for involving older children in the process of selecting who their guardian will be. The more transparent you are with your children, the easier it will be if something happens to you as they will take comfort knowing who will care for them.
By partaking in such a process it is also an opportunity for your children to tell you their thought process, and the person who you ascertained as being ideal to care for your children may be a person who your children want to care for by. These conversations will also provide you with comfort knowing that your children are happy with the person who will be appointed their guardian in your Will.
We often don’t want to give contemplation to who would care for our children however, taking the time to carefully consider who would care for your children if you were no longer here will provide you with peace of mind that all is in place if the unexpected happened to you.
Melisa Sloan, author of Legacy, is an Estate Planning Lawyer with extensive experience in assisting people with putting in place their Estate Plan. Find out more at www.madisonsloanlawyers.com.au
